Self-Care, Expectations and Motherhood

This is Matt.

He is having a sheet mask on a Friday morning when he and his brother Mikey (who apparently was responsible for the horror of waking up before the day had officially started) woke up at an ungodly hour (probably earlier than 5am 🤷🏽) ready to start the day.

 Favourite Sheet Mask for him is a Coconut Oil and Aloe Vera one I get from iHerb

Favourite Sheet Mask for him is a Coconut Oil and Aloe Vera one I get from iHerb

Now, what this little one and his sidekick didn’t know, was that I had plans. After a week without end, I was tired and looking forward to waking up before them to do a sheet mask alone. Maybe have a coffee whilst the house was asleep. In my delusion, I even imagined myself watching something cultural (ahem, Jane the Virgin!) on TV as I waited for everyone to wake up.

As they marched into my room (and I cursed under my breath), I made a decision not to let this derail my day. So, I rushed to the bathroom and grabbed 3 sheet masks from my stash (I have one inspired by fellow mom Layla Saad) and then the 3 of us went downstairs for some quite time before #MrB, who had called dibs on a lay in that morning, fully woke up.

Mikey had 0 interest in them, he wanted to play. But Matt sat there relaxing, happy and zen-like, whilst I did my own mask, I was committed to pampering myself however possible, and his brother destroyed the house like a T-Rex would. In the chaos of the whole scene, there was also lots of joy.

Let me be honest with you, I'm not a relaxed parent. In fact, I have read, heard and researched loads around how to let go of the stress and be much more flexible as a mom and human. However, that morning by finding a way to match our reality with my expectations, by being flexible and playful, I realised I was creating a better impact in their childhood and my own mothering satisfaction.

So, apart from inviting you to prioritise on some Self-Care today, on your own terms and to match your life, I would highly vow to use more flexibility and fluidity in parenthood and letting expectations and perfection go for a bit... Who knows? I might even become an expert on this ordeal and teach courses on how not to lose it with kids in the near future!

Whatever happens, I can honestly say that this is one of my proudest days as a mom and happiest early Friday morning memory to this day.

How could you use flexibility today to empower your own journey? Where can you let go of expectations to leave way for joy?

Let me know and let’s share our journeys into womanhood and beyond!

Shame, Vulnerability and Navigating through Sacred Womanhood

Shame, Vulnerability and Navigating through Sacred Womanhood

After every launch, event, workshop (every corporate or business birth, basically) we go through a low period. The adrenaline goes, the excitement washes off and we're left naked, open, raw, exposed to a crowd of one or thousands, vulnerable and real.

That's when our ego (or as Layla Saad cleverly calls it: SHEgo) charges up, taking one swing after another, pushing just the right bottoms to get us to shut up, to go small, to stay confused and purposeless. To forget why did we raised ourselves, why did we spoke at all. At least for me, that's ALWAYS the case.

So, on the Sunday following my first Sacred Womanhood Tribe meeting I was crushed. Ironically, starting these new program with a focus on Vulnerability meant I basically spent 1 hour talking about my eating disorder, my weight and body acceptance issues and, prepare to be amazed, my extensive plastic surgery (before you wonder: tummy tuck and breast enhancement) and how all of these experiences are shaped by vulnerability and my fear of not belonging, by how much I worked on altering myself (both physically and emotionally) to fit into a mold made for me by society and a culture I thought was my cage.

Anger

Anger

As soon as I picked him up, lifting him from his little shoulders, bringing him to ‘my height’, as if that was something to be proud of, I knew it was wrong. Yet I pushed through. I couldn’t stop myself. I got him to see eye-to-eye with me and then I delivered my: ‘I have enough!’ speech and set him roughly back down.

It was one of those days. ‘Those days’. The ones where it feels like all the energies around are against your goals and wishes. Those that make your skin crawl and itch. Those days that many times are the beginning of an end. That was precisely the day.

Holistic Packing as a Holistic Coach and Momma

Holistic Packing as a Holistic Coach and Momma

This post started like a little inside joke. I have been packing for what feels like days in preparation for our short family holidays, and decided to tackle our First Aid kit (a good excuse to take a break from actively potty training my almost-3-year-old toddler) before I would forget. So, I took a little bag and started putting our essentials in, and then I took a glance and started laughing. When did the transformation into a full on crunchy mom happen?

Now, I say this with a heart full of laughter and with knowing that this path I’m in feels SO in tuned with my family and me. But, we’re as crunchy as it comes nowadays, and the funniest part is that it wasn’t always the case. In fact, quite the opposite!

Grieving what wasn't

Grieving what wasn't

Last week, I saw on Social Media a little note that said: It's ok the grief the pregnancy you wished you had. It was simple yet powerful and it got me thinking. I started thinking about the two amazing pregnancies I have experienced. The differences and the similarities. It also got me thinking about my birth stories, all that went as I planned and all that didn't. But, what hit me the most was when I thought about the fourth trimester period with both my kids. That's what I have grieved the most.